Firstly, the Ex - Men in my life have been driving me a little mental. Two have sent emails which apparently look like generic ones, you know, they start with ‘Hello All’ and go on to give changed email Id’s and numbers and some pc type bull. BUT, But! Common friends, who should also have got these emails have not received anything. Means what? Means what??!! Especially since there was very vocal mandate to be followed post break ups of no calling, no texting, no mailing, please fuck the hell off between us.
Means so they genuinely want to inform of changed email id? (first of all who changes their email id after like high school??) OR it is ruse to see if I mail them?? What on earth could it mean I wondered all day, till a male friend deduced that ‘Chumma they are sending to mind fuck’. Err. Ya, thanks pa. Very elementary Holmes.
Then yesterday, I find out that this boy that had a crush on me is suddenly seeing someone else. Till like just one week back, the said boy was most flirty and even mushy.
Everyone said “he likes you ya…a lot”
Everyone said I better decide if I liked him back.
Then suddenly yesterday Everyone said “Oh sorry ya, he’s with girlfriend”
Like before I could even change my line of approach, smile back maybe, not wack him on the back of his head maybe, look intensely, look away and look back intensely (that great woman gaze trick) maybe… he’s with Girlfriend!
First of all, aforementioned boy was classified nerd and apparently even they are faster than me, second of all, I never thought I was slow on the uptake on such matters. It has come as rude shock.
The only good thing about all this is the fact that I think I’m finally attracting the right kind of men. Decent, Normal, Full time Employed, Good Family type men.
After spending my early twenties attracting absolute assholes, the more assholic the better, suddenly I am in Sita Central.
But, how do I explain that when you’ve spent most of your twenties being pursued by ridiculously libidinous men who simply did not take no for an answer, and actually were of the ‘no’ means ‘yes’ morse code, where it basically felt like being cave woman and being pulled into yonder bramble bush for a tumble, no questions asked, all this sudden having to say the right thing, having to give very clear ‘I’m interested’ signals, is all very tiresome.
I somehow escaped the whole ‘game-playing’ business that most relationships are heir to, simply by virtue of being in the film – industry, where all it took was a long tired day and some large vodka’s at the end of it to get things going. You lasted till the film lasted. Period. Some are still great friends and some apparently send you confusing emails!
But Corporate life has dulled me. Made me an effectual flirt and simply slow. Men who actually like me, I’m reading as frandships. Men who are only trying to be friends or maybe who dig my female friends and are routing it through me, I am reading as being interested in me. Such 9th standard dilemma’s I haven’t experienced since ummm, lets see… 9th standard.